Due to high consumer demand, Frankenstein Government will now remain open around the clock, 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
These hours are effective immediately and will coincide with a number of events this fall, the least of which will be the Foodstamp President getting kicked the fuck out of our house. The White House will probably be a downgrade, like a HUD home, for Romney.
Soon this will all be over. Like a bad dream. Until then, I have two words. Gary Johnson. Vote well or not at all.