Frankenstein Government Considers Paying Readers, Or Boob-A-Thons, In Desperate Attempt To Acquire More Readers

Ya know I've been banging away at this keyboard for a little over two years. I manage about 2000 page views a week.

I will never advertise.

Then I see these new blogs come on line. Half naked chicks, funny shit, guns, and more half naked chicks. What happens? The new blogs get gobs of followers, page views up the ying yang. What happens to me? Nada. Left at the altar. Same old number of followers, same old amount of page views.

Even when I manage to write clever shit.

I can't do the half naked chick thing. My friend Al says I should. He says the internet was primarily invented by men to exchange porn. For free. All of this other shit is ancillary according to Al. Google earth, maps, buying shit, writing nasty stuff about the government. A waste of time, Al says. Time spent looking at porn is time well spent. You gotta admit, it's hard to argue that.

Al's sister, Jenny, suggested I get girls to lift their shirts and snap photos from the neck down. Post them here. Kind of like a boob-a-thon. I wonder about that family of theirs. I am not sure a boob-a-thon is the way to go.

I am ready for some new kind of recruiting or membership drive. Maybe I will have to start paying people. Perhaps I will hold a weekly raffle. Now there's an idea. If you leave a comment, a nice one, I will put your name in a jar and draw a name. Send prizes.

Or maybe I should just stick with half naked chicks.  

Comments

Gary said…
After six months I am up to 500 pageviews a day on my main blog without ads or boobs (though I do sneak in a shot or two on some stories.)

It will be interesting to see if there is any growth beyond this point. Not all of us can be Drudge.
Brian said…
Well you grew by one Gary. Thank you. You have made the honor roll...
Chris W said…
I feel your pain.

I don't want to do the whole rule 5 thing just to get fake traffic either. It just gets discouraging especially when I write something that feels good and get no visits out of it.

I shouldn't complain though as in the past few months I've gone from 50-75 page views a day to almost 200 a day in December. But it's taken 2 years to get there.

I guess we all need to keep plugging away.
Selous Scout said…
I added you to my Blog of the week sidebar widget. Now both my viewers will see you.

http://selousscouts.blogspot.com/
Anonymous said…
Why don't you lobby for a government subsidy? I'm sure they can find a way to spread the readers around!
Anonymous said…
I dig your blog. I don't visit many. What are some of the blogs that you admire that get a ton of hits? I'm curious what would make them stand out so much.
Anonymous said…
Oh, I think I found one that you mean.

http://theferalirishman.blogspot.com/2011/12/g-nite.html

;)
rawmuse said…
It's the same reason that Libertarians can't get votes. "Vote for me, I will take away the cookie jar and pay down our debts!"
Anonymous said…
Brian you are better off with 2000 hits of quality than a larger quantity.

It hurts to think, and some people avoid pain at all costs.

Society has conditioned people of intellect to somehow feel guilty about the fact they are perceptually aware.

So the easy way is to have things delivered on a platter like -- what didn't really happen -or- alex j -or- any of these fill in the blank 911 truthers -or- the patriotards whose major contribution is how much energy powder or water purification or dried foods one can flog.

The bottom line is you provide a refuge for those 2000 a week who come here precisely because you ain't one of the other boyz.

And that is why it would be a shame to lose you.

I find I agree with your viewpoint about 40% of the time, but I do concede that even when I don't agree, it's intelligently presented and therefore makes me think about my own position.

More pain accrues to me from that exercise.

I don't blame you for the rant, but if you give up, where do we end up going then?
I don't do naked ladies, either. In the New Heaven and New Earth, I don't want to get punished with a desk job.

I'm not a high traffic puller either. I take pride in the people who stop by and stay awhile. If I can get one person a day to get engaged in what I write, I feel I have succeeded.

It's on the posts that I have researched and put the most into that I get no comments on. I attribute this to leaving them speechless.
Brian said…
Thanks everyone!

I even managed to lose a follower..I am gonna confine my half naked chick gawking to other sites. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. I may not have a giant quantity of readers...

but I sure have quality ones!!!
Anonymous said…
Yeah,

Come to think of it. If you started putting up half-naked chicks, I admit that I would probably gawk for a bit. But then I would come to think of your site differently and most likely completely lose interest rather quickly. I'm not totally sure, but I don't think it's all that hard to find half-naked chicks on the internet already.

However, brutally honest and witty writing without underlying motives is not quite as common.

Besides, a few people might want a web page that can be read at work or at home with kids around!
Anonymous said…
I like you just fine.. Hard to believe you were a cop, either I have misjudged 95% of the cops I have ever come across or your're special. I think your special. I will post your blog a few times at ZH that ought to help..
Always On Watch said…
I've never been sure why some blogs get so much traffic and others do not.

I do know, however, that one has to comment all over the place to drive traffic up. I don't have time for that nowadays.
Irish said…
Brian, I fit your description to a Tee! :)

That being said, I enjoy your blog and read your posts as well as many others that share my same thoughts and feelings. It also gets to be a downer sometimes with all the negative news. Posting funny picks or hot girls is just a break from that. Before I started a blog I used to surf the internet and when I found something interesting I would send out link or picture to a group of friends.

It's kinda like sitting at the bar with your buddies and saying "Hey check out that girl over there" or "Hey I got a great joke".

By starting my blog I just happened to increase my circle of people that I share with.

I am not good at writing so I read and repost great articles that I find on line.

I do this as a hobby and it's interesting to see how many people from allll over the world come to my little corner of the web.

I hope this gives you a little insight into my perspective of the things that I do and why I would post a picture of a beautiful women or tell a dirty joke.

Sometimes all the doom and gloom just sucks :)

Regards, and keep posting what you do, its good reading

PISSED
Brian said…
Pissed- I love your blog.

I have always been focused on trying to get people to wake up especially after the greatest fraud of all time- the one that completely ruined any chance of recovery. That was the tradeoff in Nov. of '08. Paulson and Congress sold the entire US economy out to save his cronies.

Anyway, I am just whining. Keep up the good work. I enjoy the pics and your blog.

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